queenriley (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
queenriley) wrote2003-11-23 07:06 am
queenriley) wrote2003-11-23 07:06 am
(no subject)
So looking back, I haven't updated for awhile. I mean, I made the post to make sure my fellow Houstonians survived the massive flooding and multiple tornados, but it'd been almost two weeks before that. So I really ought to update.
The thing is, I don't know what to update about. I could update about Alex, but I think you lot probably get tired of hearing about my daughter. Except my life kind of revolves around her right now, which is pretty pathetic, in a way.
I could update about my intro to Judaism class which is going really well, and how I'll get to start my real actual conversion class sometime in mid-January (and I won't have to drive for over an hour to reach the other end of Houston to get to it... I hate Houston traffic). But something tells me my views on religion would offend more than a few people on my friends list because... well... most of you are Christian (or atheist, or agnostic, or I'm just not sure). My views, though generally open and accepting, have rather negative feelings towards Christianity (which has NOTHING to do with my Judaism classes, I've had negative feelings towards Christianity since I started attending church when I was just a toddler... and those feelings only got stronger as I got older, and bordering on revulsion since moving to the Bible Belt). I don't wish to offend anybody or step on any toes, and I really think my conversion would bore most of you to tears anyway.
I could update about my wild party life, but I don't actually have one.
I could update about my complete lack of excitement for anything, but that's boring too.
I could update about my current obsession with Buffy the Vampire Slayer... something I used to be beyond obsessed with but lost interest in the show (mostly) after fourth season (which I didn't even like that much of). I've fallen in love again with seasons 1-3 and am watching them on DVD thanks muchly to Netflix. But I don't think many of you (though I know of a few) watch Buffy or know much of anything at all about Buffy, so it'd be kind of pointless wouldn't it?
I could update about the Thanksgiving mix-up! That's something semi-interesting... or... well... it's not really, but it's a story, and that's always good. See, I'd figured it out. Every year Jeff and I struggle to make an appearance at Meme's Thanksgiving dinner, his parents, and my parents. That's three Thanksgiving meals in one day... and it was killing us. We were always sick and miserable the rest of that day and the following weekend. This year Meme can't do her own, and so is joining either Jeff's parents or one of her other children. But that still leaves Jeff's parents (who eat at ungodly early hours, like 2... who wants dinner at 2 in the afternoon?) and then my parents. That's two turkeys, two dressings, two sweet potatoes, two green bean casseroles, two cranberry sauces, two pumpkin pies, two everything. And it's too much. So this year I had it figured out. My parents have me, Jeff, and Alex. We are the only family in the area who can come to Thanksgiving dinner. Jeff's parents have me, Jeff, Alex, Jeff's brother, Jeff's sister and her husband, Jeff's mother's parents, Jeff's mother's brother (who rarely shows anyway), Jeff's father's mother (Meme), and sometimes even Jeff's father's brother, sisters, and their families. So there is a big crowd there for Thanksgiving. I don't like big crowds. I don't like big crowds of people who don't like me, or pretend to like me because they have to, or are just starting to like me again and therefore examine everything I say to make sure I'm not insulting. I feel insanely uncomfortable at Jeff's parents house... and for that matter, so does he most of the time, especially at the family gatherings. It doesn't help that his mother is uber-religious and into Jesus, and his father is a Christmas fiend who has been counting down the days since before Halloween. So I figured it out. My parents are moving in a year, hopefully back to Virginia, though they are also looking into northern Texas (the hill country) because it's nice up there (whereas here is hellish). Since they are moving and we aren't likely to get many more (if any) Thanksgivings with them, and the fact that they only have us to celebrate with, Jeff and I talked about it and decided we'd eat dinner with my parents this year and stop in later in the evening for a visit with his parents, but we weren't doing dinner with them. Sounds like a great plan, and it would have been. Except I can't tell his mother that, or she'll be very upset with me and start another fight/blame war. But Jeff can tell her and she'd be okay with it, so it was up to Jeff. We decided this before Halloween. I assumed he'd told his parents. Until Thursday when he came home from picking something up at their house and said "My mom wants to know if you'll bring the green bean casserole this year." To which I replied "What? Of course I won't. We aren't eating dinner over there, remember?" He gave me his patented blank stare and I literally saw it click in his head. "Oh. Yeah. I forgot. I haven't told them yet." This was Thursday... a week before. Which means Lyn already has everything planned and bought and ready to go. Which means she's already done a massive cleaning and set things up for Alex. Which means she'll now be very very mad if we say we can't go. So we'll go there again this year... but I'm not eating and I won't let Jeff or Alex eat either. We'll stop in for an hour, explain the mixup but hang around until dinner is ready. Then we'll leave. Because I will not do to my parents this year what we ended up doing last year. My mother already has everything for a nice meal and she's counting on us because she has enough food for all of us. If we don't eat there, she wasted a lot of money and a lot of food. And we did it to her last year by not eating hardly anything because we'd eaten with Jeff's parents and Meme. And they have plenty of people to help them eat. My parents keep getting the bum end of the deal and for once I'd like them to get everything first.
I think that's all I had that I could update about. Though I'm curious now, because of my brief rant on religion above... just what religion, or lack thereof, are all of you? I can't do the poll thing because I don't have a paid account, so if you could just leave a comment with your religion.
The thing is, I don't know what to update about. I could update about Alex, but I think you lot probably get tired of hearing about my daughter. Except my life kind of revolves around her right now, which is pretty pathetic, in a way.
I could update about my intro to Judaism class which is going really well, and how I'll get to start my real actual conversion class sometime in mid-January (and I won't have to drive for over an hour to reach the other end of Houston to get to it... I hate Houston traffic). But something tells me my views on religion would offend more than a few people on my friends list because... well... most of you are Christian (or atheist, or agnostic, or I'm just not sure). My views, though generally open and accepting, have rather negative feelings towards Christianity (which has NOTHING to do with my Judaism classes, I've had negative feelings towards Christianity since I started attending church when I was just a toddler... and those feelings only got stronger as I got older, and bordering on revulsion since moving to the Bible Belt). I don't wish to offend anybody or step on any toes, and I really think my conversion would bore most of you to tears anyway.
I could update about my wild party life, but I don't actually have one.
I could update about my complete lack of excitement for anything, but that's boring too.
I could update about my current obsession with Buffy the Vampire Slayer... something I used to be beyond obsessed with but lost interest in the show (mostly) after fourth season (which I didn't even like that much of). I've fallen in love again with seasons 1-3 and am watching them on DVD thanks muchly to Netflix. But I don't think many of you (though I know of a few) watch Buffy or know much of anything at all about Buffy, so it'd be kind of pointless wouldn't it?
I could update about the Thanksgiving mix-up! That's something semi-interesting... or... well... it's not really, but it's a story, and that's always good. See, I'd figured it out. Every year Jeff and I struggle to make an appearance at Meme's Thanksgiving dinner, his parents, and my parents. That's three Thanksgiving meals in one day... and it was killing us. We were always sick and miserable the rest of that day and the following weekend. This year Meme can't do her own, and so is joining either Jeff's parents or one of her other children. But that still leaves Jeff's parents (who eat at ungodly early hours, like 2... who wants dinner at 2 in the afternoon?) and then my parents. That's two turkeys, two dressings, two sweet potatoes, two green bean casseroles, two cranberry sauces, two pumpkin pies, two everything. And it's too much. So this year I had it figured out. My parents have me, Jeff, and Alex. We are the only family in the area who can come to Thanksgiving dinner. Jeff's parents have me, Jeff, Alex, Jeff's brother, Jeff's sister and her husband, Jeff's mother's parents, Jeff's mother's brother (who rarely shows anyway), Jeff's father's mother (Meme), and sometimes even Jeff's father's brother, sisters, and their families. So there is a big crowd there for Thanksgiving. I don't like big crowds. I don't like big crowds of people who don't like me, or pretend to like me because they have to, or are just starting to like me again and therefore examine everything I say to make sure I'm not insulting. I feel insanely uncomfortable at Jeff's parents house... and for that matter, so does he most of the time, especially at the family gatherings. It doesn't help that his mother is uber-religious and into Jesus, and his father is a Christmas fiend who has been counting down the days since before Halloween. So I figured it out. My parents are moving in a year, hopefully back to Virginia, though they are also looking into northern Texas (the hill country) because it's nice up there (whereas here is hellish). Since they are moving and we aren't likely to get many more (if any) Thanksgivings with them, and the fact that they only have us to celebrate with, Jeff and I talked about it and decided we'd eat dinner with my parents this year and stop in later in the evening for a visit with his parents, but we weren't doing dinner with them. Sounds like a great plan, and it would have been. Except I can't tell his mother that, or she'll be very upset with me and start another fight/blame war. But Jeff can tell her and she'd be okay with it, so it was up to Jeff. We decided this before Halloween. I assumed he'd told his parents. Until Thursday when he came home from picking something up at their house and said "My mom wants to know if you'll bring the green bean casserole this year." To which I replied "What? Of course I won't. We aren't eating dinner over there, remember?" He gave me his patented blank stare and I literally saw it click in his head. "Oh. Yeah. I forgot. I haven't told them yet." This was Thursday... a week before. Which means Lyn already has everything planned and bought and ready to go. Which means she's already done a massive cleaning and set things up for Alex. Which means she'll now be very very mad if we say we can't go. So we'll go there again this year... but I'm not eating and I won't let Jeff or Alex eat either. We'll stop in for an hour, explain the mixup but hang around until dinner is ready. Then we'll leave. Because I will not do to my parents this year what we ended up doing last year. My mother already has everything for a nice meal and she's counting on us because she has enough food for all of us. If we don't eat there, she wasted a lot of money and a lot of food. And we did it to her last year by not eating hardly anything because we'd eaten with Jeff's parents and Meme. And they have plenty of people to help them eat. My parents keep getting the bum end of the deal and for once I'd like them to get everything first.
I think that's all I had that I could update about. Though I'm curious now, because of my brief rant on religion above... just what religion, or lack thereof, are all of you? I can't do the poll thing because I don't have a paid account, so if you could just leave a comment with your religion.
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Though I am a Christian (Baptist, technically), I can certainly understand the deep loathing of Christianity you seem to feel. I am frequently disillusioned with people who call themselves Christians myself, but it has nothing to do with the religion itself. Mainly the people who claim to practice it. I think the biggest problem I have has to do with the "not seeing the forest for the trees" aspect. People get so caught up in the minutiae of the religion - what we do, what we don't do - that they miss the point entirely.
BTW, I love Buffy too. I like the later seasons, but I'll always have a soft spot for the high school years. Everyone was far more interesting back then. :p
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I always welcome a new person, especially a fellow Buffy lover. And baptists are okay sometimes. I am great friends with a very very devout baptist and he's a good man. My Rabbi says I need to show a little more respect for Christians, especially considering where we live (I am actually northeast of Houston and not in the actual city, so we are "rural" and "small-townish"). I have nothing against the religion itself, but rather the people I've met in it.
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At least next year you can work it this way. If your parents are still in Texas, you can go one to place for Thanksgiving and one for Christmas.
I'm sorry your situation is so tense with the in-laws. That whole religious fanaticism is a bit scary. I have no problem with faith, but my family was basically torn apart for a while when my brother joined a Jesus cult. (the pastor of their "church" was later put in jail for child molestation)For him, Jesus was a substitute for my dad, who had died when he was 14. I think true faith enhances your life, but it isn't a substitute for something that's lacking. (Does that make sense?)
We're Catholics, but I like hearing about other religions. In fact, we have lots of big discussions about Christianity and Islam with our Moslem friends. In Texas, it's a lot less threatening sometimes to talk to non-Christians about religion than it is to talk to some Christians if you're Catholic. A lot of people don't think we're Christians. Go figure!
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We'll figure something out with holidays next year... we still have to figure out what to do about Christmas and Chanukkah and that whole mess.
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Which is fine by me, since I don't feel the need to belong to a society of likeminded believers anyway.
I wouldn't mind hearing you talk about Judaism. I know next to nothing about it and would like to educate myself but since I don't have time, reading what you have to say sounds interesting :)
BAH to Jeff. Tell him that he needs to get a notebook and write stuff down. It's the only thing that us people-with-short-term-memory-of-the-goldfish-variety can do to avoid making the rest of you go insane.
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I'd tell him to carry a notebook, but I don't think it'd work... he'd forget the notebook, or forget to write things down, or forget to look at it.
And maybe I ought to make a filter for those interested in learning about Judaism. As I learn about it, I can post what I learn, as well as book lists and things like that...
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percival
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As for religion. I'm a borderline case. My mother (I have no idea about dad) is atheist. I'm more agnostic/reluctant Christian. I try as much as I can to respect other people's beliefs and I'm pretty interested in other religions. Still, I don't like it when people try to stuff their beliefs down your throat. I'm pretty wary of missionarism (if that's even a word).
And as for Buffy, speak away. I'm not fanatic about Buffy but I'm always interested in hearing about it and reading about it, I told you about me reading Reading the Vampire Slayer (and also I think season 3 rocks).
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And wow, it's stories like yours that make me almost glad that my father's family and mine don't get along well enough to consider having holidays together. It is sad, though.
In answer to your question, I have decided to classify myself as agnostic rather than atheist because my entire problem with most religions is that they claim to *know* something that I don't believe can be known. I don't believe in God, but calling myself an atheist implies a knowledge that there is no god, and I don't purport to have that. My favorite religion is Buddhism because I believe in the Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path and things, and I'm in the process of trying to learn enough to philosophize intelligently about it. And I do believe that *something* happens to our "essence" or spirit or soul or whatever when we die, because it doesn't make sense to me that it could just go out - rather like the law of conservation of mass, or whatever, in science :P
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As for my own beliefs - I currently call myself a Zen Lutheran. When you've lived two prior lives, you kind of have to be open-minded about matters of faith. I grew up as a military brat and went to 'generic christianity' churches during that time of my young life. I noticed a certain inconsistency to the message, which bugged me as I got older and more capable of thinking about such things. The exclusionary aspects of christianity (i.e., we're the only ones going to heaven) really felt wrong to me. The Eightfold Path and the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism made a lot more sense. So now I combine things in a way that 'feels right' to me. Every day I learn something new.
Good luck with your parents and in-laws. Yee-hah - try to look at it with a sense of humor if you can... with situations like that, all you can do sometimes is laugh. I've been in family gatherings that I could have sworn were scripted by Mel Brooks. "Blazing In-Laws", anyone?
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Pseudo-Buddhism plus a whole lot of superstition. That's me.
I would be interested in reading about Judaism, though, if for no other reason than, um, well, it's not Christianity.
Whee?
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But hey, just Grandaddy and Dad! That's pretty good, considering you usually have... what... four dinners to go to?