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Jun. 22nd, 2003 08:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
queenrileyNow, after a short chat with ami last night and 7 hours of sleep... well... I was hoping to feel better. But I'm not. I'm still depressed. I'm still wanting to cry.
His death was meaningless, pointless. He was a pure plot device... right from the very begining of the book, he was just a plot device. He didn't develop much more than we knew from PoA. He went to save Harry, yes, and that was good, but he died a meaningless death anyway. And I'm furious over it. He deserved better. They all do.
Near the middle, when Arthur was so badly hurt, I thought it would be him. I thought, even though he made it through, his wounds wouldn't stop bleeding. They even said so in St. Mungo's. His wounds would NOT stop bleeding. I was sure it would be him. And I was okay with that. I was sad and upset that, in my mind, he was pegged for death, but his death would have made sense. It would not have been random-plot-device death. He would have died doing something for the Order, something for the greater good. He would have died knowing he had made a difference. I didn't want him to die any more than I wanted anybody else to die, but it wouldn't have been meaningless.
Sirius. My God, what was the point to it? Sirius deserved so much better than that. And Remus... where the hell was Remus? His name was mentioned on the pages, he even had a few lines, but he was so... not Remus. He was predictable, flat, with a complete lack of personality. What the hell was up with that? The only glimmer of the Remus we knew in PoA I caught at the end, when Sirius died. When his voice kept cracking. When he was holding Harry back... I really think he was holding himself back too. I think he wanted to scream right along with Harry. But he knew he couldn't, because Harry is his responsibility now. He may not be godfather or appointed to the task in any way, but he is all that is left of those who really truely knew James and Lily, the only one left who can teach Harry who his parents were, teach him who Sirius was. He's the only one left. Though we did get a few brief glimpses of hope for R/S, mostly in Snape's memory and just a few random comments thrown out in the book, but it's gone now. I suppose the only hope we can have for those two is, if Remus manages to stay alive for the next two books mind, that Remus ends up alone, even in the epilogue... that he's alone. That he stays alone. That he takes no female companion. May he truely be allowed to mourn the loss of his best friend, because if JKR for some reason trivializes what Remus will be going through in the next book (even if they weren't lovers, even if they were just close friends, it still hurts like hell) or doesn't even mention through Harry that Remus seems a little upset, geez... if she doesn't show it, I'll be really mad... really truely deep down angry at the woman. Right now I'm just miffed that she killed Sirius. I'll get over that.
Why didn't Harry use the mirror? I never once forgot about that mirror. I may not have known what it was, but every time he said "I need to talk to Sirius." and couldn't think of a way, I wanted to smack him and say "Open the present. Use that. He said if you ever needed to that you could. Why else would he have given it to you?" But the present went forgotten and that doesn't make sense with the rest of the book. With as curious as we know Harry is, with as curious as he was the entire book, to just forget a present from his godfather, to never look at it, to forget that he had a way of contacting Sirius... that was very out of character, I think. The Harry I thought I knew would have torn into that present as soon as they got back, just to see what it was if nothing else. He wouldn't have forgotten something Sirius gave him that was obviously important when it was given. It just all goes back to the plot device. It was all just something to move the story along. And that irritates me.
Okay, where was Ron? Even in the very begining, where was Ron? He seemed somewhat out of character to me. He seemed weak, dumb, slow, and whingy. He was not like that in previous books. Sure, he had his moments, what teenage boy doesn't? But really...
And the lack of R/H is irritating me too. There were a few good moments in there, such as the peck on the cheek, but that's about it. Harry was being really oblivious this book. He's normally such an observant good boy, and speaking of Harry, how in the world did he not figure out that the dreams he was having about the door, about wanting what was behind it, how did he not figure out that it wasn't him, that it was Voldemort controlling it? Dear lord, you'd think the boy could tell the difference between his curiosity and a madman's obsession. I mean, we see nothing that Harry does not see, and I figured out it was Voldemort manipulating Harry from the very first dream.
I adored the pre-H/G. That was really nice to see. It was also nice to see Ginny develop as a character, to really come into her own in this book. I adored absolutely every part with Neville. How he ran after Harry. How he was so determined to really do well in D.A. He was so BRAVE at the end! I adore Neville... and amazing, the things we learned about him in this book. Had Voldemort made a different choice in 1981, perhaps we'd be reading Neville Longbottom and the Order of the Phoenix. Neville could have been the one in the prophecy. It might have been. Imagine...
There was a lot I adored about this book. Most of it will have to wait for another day, however, as I'm still really upset. I'm still reeling from Sirius. He's dead. Dead. He's not coming back. There is no back from what happened to him. I hold no hope any longer, though after reading his death (I had to stop for about ten minutes to compose myself enough to read on and not cry all over my book... Jeff was worried about me) I was right there with Harry, trying to think of ways he could come back. I just... I miss him.
And that is all, for now, I suppose.
Alex is having an impromtu birthday party this afternoon since she missed the one she was going to have on her birthday with the family and friends still here in Texas. It should be fun, if I can keep from bursting into tears every time I get reminded of OotP or the death.
Edited because I can't seem to keep track of where my spoilers go.
His death was meaningless, pointless. He was a pure plot device... right from the very begining of the book, he was just a plot device. He didn't develop much more than we knew from PoA. He went to save Harry, yes, and that was good, but he died a meaningless death anyway. And I'm furious over it. He deserved better. They all do.
Near the middle, when Arthur was so badly hurt, I thought it would be him. I thought, even though he made it through, his wounds wouldn't stop bleeding. They even said so in St. Mungo's. His wounds would NOT stop bleeding. I was sure it would be him. And I was okay with that. I was sad and upset that, in my mind, he was pegged for death, but his death would have made sense. It would not have been random-plot-device death. He would have died doing something for the Order, something for the greater good. He would have died knowing he had made a difference. I didn't want him to die any more than I wanted anybody else to die, but it wouldn't have been meaningless.
Sirius. My God, what was the point to it? Sirius deserved so much better than that. And Remus... where the hell was Remus? His name was mentioned on the pages, he even had a few lines, but he was so... not Remus. He was predictable, flat, with a complete lack of personality. What the hell was up with that? The only glimmer of the Remus we knew in PoA I caught at the end, when Sirius died. When his voice kept cracking. When he was holding Harry back... I really think he was holding himself back too. I think he wanted to scream right along with Harry. But he knew he couldn't, because Harry is his responsibility now. He may not be godfather or appointed to the task in any way, but he is all that is left of those who really truely knew James and Lily, the only one left who can teach Harry who his parents were, teach him who Sirius was. He's the only one left. Though we did get a few brief glimpses of hope for R/S, mostly in Snape's memory and just a few random comments thrown out in the book, but it's gone now. I suppose the only hope we can have for those two is, if Remus manages to stay alive for the next two books mind, that Remus ends up alone, even in the epilogue... that he's alone. That he stays alone. That he takes no female companion. May he truely be allowed to mourn the loss of his best friend, because if JKR for some reason trivializes what Remus will be going through in the next book (even if they weren't lovers, even if they were just close friends, it still hurts like hell) or doesn't even mention through Harry that Remus seems a little upset, geez... if she doesn't show it, I'll be really mad... really truely deep down angry at the woman. Right now I'm just miffed that she killed Sirius. I'll get over that.
Why didn't Harry use the mirror? I never once forgot about that mirror. I may not have known what it was, but every time he said "I need to talk to Sirius." and couldn't think of a way, I wanted to smack him and say "Open the present. Use that. He said if you ever needed to that you could. Why else would he have given it to you?" But the present went forgotten and that doesn't make sense with the rest of the book. With as curious as we know Harry is, with as curious as he was the entire book, to just forget a present from his godfather, to never look at it, to forget that he had a way of contacting Sirius... that was very out of character, I think. The Harry I thought I knew would have torn into that present as soon as they got back, just to see what it was if nothing else. He wouldn't have forgotten something Sirius gave him that was obviously important when it was given. It just all goes back to the plot device. It was all just something to move the story along. And that irritates me.
Okay, where was Ron? Even in the very begining, where was Ron? He seemed somewhat out of character to me. He seemed weak, dumb, slow, and whingy. He was not like that in previous books. Sure, he had his moments, what teenage boy doesn't? But really...
And the lack of R/H is irritating me too. There were a few good moments in there, such as the peck on the cheek, but that's about it. Harry was being really oblivious this book. He's normally such an observant good boy, and speaking of Harry, how in the world did he not figure out that the dreams he was having about the door, about wanting what was behind it, how did he not figure out that it wasn't him, that it was Voldemort controlling it? Dear lord, you'd think the boy could tell the difference between his curiosity and a madman's obsession. I mean, we see nothing that Harry does not see, and I figured out it was Voldemort manipulating Harry from the very first dream.
I adored the pre-H/G. That was really nice to see. It was also nice to see Ginny develop as a character, to really come into her own in this book. I adored absolutely every part with Neville. How he ran after Harry. How he was so determined to really do well in D.A. He was so BRAVE at the end! I adore Neville... and amazing, the things we learned about him in this book. Had Voldemort made a different choice in 1981, perhaps we'd be reading Neville Longbottom and the Order of the Phoenix. Neville could have been the one in the prophecy. It might have been. Imagine...
There was a lot I adored about this book. Most of it will have to wait for another day, however, as I'm still really upset. I'm still reeling from Sirius. He's dead. Dead. He's not coming back. There is no back from what happened to him. I hold no hope any longer, though after reading his death (I had to stop for about ten minutes to compose myself enough to read on and not cry all over my book... Jeff was worried about me) I was right there with Harry, trying to think of ways he could come back. I just... I miss him.
And that is all, for now, I suppose.
Alex is having an impromtu birthday party this afternoon since she missed the one she was going to have on her birthday with the family and friends still here in Texas. It should be fun, if I can keep from bursting into tears every time I get reminded of OotP or the death.
Edited because I can't seem to keep track of where my spoilers go.
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Date: 2003-06-22 07:34 am (UTC)Totally.
And I hope Alex has a great birthday party :)