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Feb. 13th, 2003 09:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
queenrileyThis update will contain: my first kiss ever, a brief overview of today, and possibly a brief discussion on romantic love. :)
I'm one of the very rare and unusual people who not only REMEMBER their true first kiss, but had it not be an awkward kiss. In fact, it was quite a lovely kiss. More on that at the end, though, as I like to end with a nice happy romantic story.
Today was a good day. I was up and showered before Alex, which is unusual, as any of my movements in the room tend to wake her up, while her father's stomping at 2am keeps her happily in her deep sleep. Angua9 showed up right on time and scared Alex by knocking on the door while Alex was standing in front of it, reaching for the doorknob to let me know she wanted to go. :) Alex got on nicely and didn't show any amount of shyness until we were in the restaurant and a large man sat at the table next to us. She was fine with Angua from the minute she walked in the door, which I think is great and definately the best sign ever that Angua is a good person... so if any of you for some crazy reason doubted it, my daughter has given proof. :) Lunch was nice, chatting was nice, Jeff leaving for work late just so he could install RAM into his computer was NOT nice, but everything else was just lovely and I'd like to do it again sometime. :) And because I'm feeling rather good right now, I won't hoard it over anybody that I got Chapter 17 of Harry Potter and the 5th Year From Hell today, while everybody else has to wait for it to be uploaded at fiction alley. I won't hoard it over anybody, I'll just mention it. ;) And it's wonderful and suspenseful and leaves you craving Chapter 18 just as it should.
Romantic love. What they show in the movies I like to call romantic lust. For me, romantic love is talking and asking questions and taking the time to really get to know somebody. Romantic love is flowers "just because I thought you'd like them" even if they aren't your favourite kind. Romantic love is getting exactly what you wanted for your birthday without having to beat him/her over the head with it. Romantic love is making a card for somebody "because you really really want to". Romantic love is somebody giving you a slip of paper, not a card or decorated in any way, just a simple slip of paper that says "I can't imagine anybody else I would rather have be the mother of my child." Romantic love is what happens after the lust and glamour of a new relationship dies away, and it WILL always die away. If the romantic love isn't there, it wasn't love in the first place. When somebody gives you a hug, holds your hand, or pokes you simply because they wanted to touch you without it being anything remotely sexual, that's romantic love. Romantic love is somebody doing the dishes because they wanted to do something nice for you. It does exist. It's not all gifts and glam and kissing and sex. It's far from it, in fact. :)
Now, the story of my first kiss. When I was 11 years old, I started getting crushes on boys. I had a long standing one with a boy in my 5th grade class. His name was Jamie. He had the most brilliant blonde hair and deep ocean blue eyes. We got glasses on the same day. I had been his friend for awhile, but I was always just "one of the guys" until he noticed one day that I was, ahem, quite a bit further along in the way of puberty and a chest than the other girls. He teased me relentlessly afterwards, but for some reason, I still had a crush on him. That was the year we found out we were moving to Texas, and I was upset that he didn't seem to care, but then, what can you really expect from an 11 year old boy? My father left for Texas in January of my 5th grade year and my mother, sister, and I stayed to sell the house. We spent a miserable summer, but we didn't realize we'd be there throughout the whole summer, so I had said sad goodbye's to all my friends on the last day of school. I even got up the guts to tell Jamie I thought he was cute. I remember he blinked at me a few times with a look of bewilderment, and all he could say was "okay". The summer passed us by and I started 6th grade in Virginia. I had only one class with Jamie and that was choir. He didn't speak to me at all that semester unless he had to. I was devestated, in my 11 year old girl way. The time came around for our fall concert, but we had sold our house and were leaving December 2. My last day of school was the day of the concert, so I used the time when I would have been singing to turn in all my books and say goodbye to my teachers. I was waiting outside the math room to give the book to the teacher, but he was delayed in a meeting and the door was locked. At that school, the classrooms were in buildings, however they were not enclosed buildings so the "hallways" were really covered sidewalks outside. It was a crisp November day and I remember watching the leaves fall in their magnificent colours, all the reds, oranges, and yellows... like fire. The concert was about to begin and I wanted to hurry and leave before I had to hear the songs I learned and practiced that I wouldn't be performing. I was leaning against the wall when Jamie walked up to me, dressed in his pressed white choir shirt with this black slacks and his hair slicked back.
"Hi." he said. I was confused, as this was more than he'd spoken to me all semester.
"Hello." I said, glaring at him.
"So you're really leaving this time, aren't you?" he asked. I nodded. He stared at me for a few minutes and I watched his eyes harden, as if he suddenly became determined to do something that he was very afraid to do. He took two steps to stand right in front of me, put one arm on the wall behind me, and quickly leaned in. It lasted for a few seconds only but at the time it felt like it lasted forever. His lips were sweet and gentle and he tasted like chocolate. He pulled back, looked at me for a minute, and he was panting.
"I'll miss you." he said and then promptly ran away before I could say anything.
That remains my most cherished memory of a kiss. I've never had one quite like it. It was so sincine, so sweet, and so innocent. I know I could spend the rest of my life searching and never have another kiss like that one.
I'm one of the very rare and unusual people who not only REMEMBER their true first kiss, but had it not be an awkward kiss. In fact, it was quite a lovely kiss. More on that at the end, though, as I like to end with a nice happy romantic story.
Today was a good day. I was up and showered before Alex, which is unusual, as any of my movements in the room tend to wake her up, while her father's stomping at 2am keeps her happily in her deep sleep. Angua9 showed up right on time and scared Alex by knocking on the door while Alex was standing in front of it, reaching for the doorknob to let me know she wanted to go. :) Alex got on nicely and didn't show any amount of shyness until we were in the restaurant and a large man sat at the table next to us. She was fine with Angua from the minute she walked in the door, which I think is great and definately the best sign ever that Angua is a good person... so if any of you for some crazy reason doubted it, my daughter has given proof. :) Lunch was nice, chatting was nice, Jeff leaving for work late just so he could install RAM into his computer was NOT nice, but everything else was just lovely and I'd like to do it again sometime. :) And because I'm feeling rather good right now, I won't hoard it over anybody that I got Chapter 17 of Harry Potter and the 5th Year From Hell today, while everybody else has to wait for it to be uploaded at fiction alley. I won't hoard it over anybody, I'll just mention it. ;) And it's wonderful and suspenseful and leaves you craving Chapter 18 just as it should.
Romantic love. What they show in the movies I like to call romantic lust. For me, romantic love is talking and asking questions and taking the time to really get to know somebody. Romantic love is flowers "just because I thought you'd like them" even if they aren't your favourite kind. Romantic love is getting exactly what you wanted for your birthday without having to beat him/her over the head with it. Romantic love is making a card for somebody "because you really really want to". Romantic love is somebody giving you a slip of paper, not a card or decorated in any way, just a simple slip of paper that says "I can't imagine anybody else I would rather have be the mother of my child." Romantic love is what happens after the lust and glamour of a new relationship dies away, and it WILL always die away. If the romantic love isn't there, it wasn't love in the first place. When somebody gives you a hug, holds your hand, or pokes you simply because they wanted to touch you without it being anything remotely sexual, that's romantic love. Romantic love is somebody doing the dishes because they wanted to do something nice for you. It does exist. It's not all gifts and glam and kissing and sex. It's far from it, in fact. :)
Now, the story of my first kiss. When I was 11 years old, I started getting crushes on boys. I had a long standing one with a boy in my 5th grade class. His name was Jamie. He had the most brilliant blonde hair and deep ocean blue eyes. We got glasses on the same day. I had been his friend for awhile, but I was always just "one of the guys" until he noticed one day that I was, ahem, quite a bit further along in the way of puberty and a chest than the other girls. He teased me relentlessly afterwards, but for some reason, I still had a crush on him. That was the year we found out we were moving to Texas, and I was upset that he didn't seem to care, but then, what can you really expect from an 11 year old boy? My father left for Texas in January of my 5th grade year and my mother, sister, and I stayed to sell the house. We spent a miserable summer, but we didn't realize we'd be there throughout the whole summer, so I had said sad goodbye's to all my friends on the last day of school. I even got up the guts to tell Jamie I thought he was cute. I remember he blinked at me a few times with a look of bewilderment, and all he could say was "okay". The summer passed us by and I started 6th grade in Virginia. I had only one class with Jamie and that was choir. He didn't speak to me at all that semester unless he had to. I was devestated, in my 11 year old girl way. The time came around for our fall concert, but we had sold our house and were leaving December 2. My last day of school was the day of the concert, so I used the time when I would have been singing to turn in all my books and say goodbye to my teachers. I was waiting outside the math room to give the book to the teacher, but he was delayed in a meeting and the door was locked. At that school, the classrooms were in buildings, however they were not enclosed buildings so the "hallways" were really covered sidewalks outside. It was a crisp November day and I remember watching the leaves fall in their magnificent colours, all the reds, oranges, and yellows... like fire. The concert was about to begin and I wanted to hurry and leave before I had to hear the songs I learned and practiced that I wouldn't be performing. I was leaning against the wall when Jamie walked up to me, dressed in his pressed white choir shirt with this black slacks and his hair slicked back.
"Hi." he said. I was confused, as this was more than he'd spoken to me all semester.
"Hello." I said, glaring at him.
"So you're really leaving this time, aren't you?" he asked. I nodded. He stared at me for a few minutes and I watched his eyes harden, as if he suddenly became determined to do something that he was very afraid to do. He took two steps to stand right in front of me, put one arm on the wall behind me, and quickly leaned in. It lasted for a few seconds only but at the time it felt like it lasted forever. His lips were sweet and gentle and he tasted like chocolate. He pulled back, looked at me for a minute, and he was panting.
"I'll miss you." he said and then promptly ran away before I could say anything.
That remains my most cherished memory of a kiss. I've never had one quite like it. It was so sincine, so sweet, and so innocent. I know I could spend the rest of my life searching and never have another kiss like that one.
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Date: 2003-02-14 05:51 am (UTC)Catherine